Written by Sallie Scoggin and Elizabeth Symington
As human beings, it’s in our nature to worry – it’s our brain’s way of keeping us safe and preparing us for what might lie ahead.
“People can worry about pretty much anything,” Rosewood Centre Psychologist Sallie Scoggin said.
“It could be about the wellbeing of others, finances and financial security, job or career issues, interacting with peers, relationship problems, and health.
“Less likely concerns can be around natural disasters, terrorism, wars, global warming and political instability.”
However, when worry becomes excessive, it becomes more habitual and can interfere with your normal functioning.
“Worry can cause us to be disengaged from the present moment,” Sallie explained.
“When anxious or uneasy, our minds may ’time-travel’ to upcoming events instead of being fully and mindfully engaged in what we are doing in that moment, such as spending time with our kids, reading a book, or having coffee with our partner.”
When this happens, Sallie suggests booking an appointment with yourself to postpone your worries to a later time.
This “Worry Time” will help you be present and enjoy what’s going on. As soon as a worrying thought appears, catch yourself, remind your brain to stop, jot down what’s worrying you and come back to it later.
“This delay tactic usually helps worry to be less intrusive in one’s life by allowing you to set boundaries around it and manage it better by confining it to a certain timeframe,” Sallie said.
“With the delay, you can later re-evaluate each worry, and you may sometimes find that it was less important than you thought, and you can drop it off your list.
“Re-evaluating your worries can also help you discern between real event worries, such as “my best friend isn’t speaking to me” (which you might be able to problem-solve), versus hypothetical worries, such as “what if I get diabetes”, which tend to be unsolvable.
Other tactics you could use to work through your worries are doing something to distract yourself from worrying, like watching a movie, getting active to help you relax, doing mindfulness exercises, or journalling.
However, Sallie says if you intentionally distract yourself from the worry, be sure to return to it later in a mindful and deliberate way, such as scheduling "Worry Time."
There are some things you can do at home to support this process and look after your mental health.
Top tips for scheduling Worry Time:
- Pick a specific time and place free from distractions and not close to bedtime. For example, “4.30pm, for 20 mins, in the home office.”
- Evaluate each worry and jot down your ideas about them; brainstorm whether you can solve them or notice if they are outside your control. If outside your control, practice gently accepting and letting go of that worry.
- Once you’ve reached your time limit, transition gently out of your worry time – do something enjoyable afterward – like going for a walk, cooking, calling a friend, or reading a book.
- Repeat and practice this every day, and your skills in managing your worry will improve.
If doing all these things is not helping you to feel and function better, it may be helpful to seek professional help.
“In therapy, we teach clients to become increasingly self-aware and learn specific skills in noticing their thoughts, self-dialogue, emotions, body sensations, and consequent behaviours,” she said.
“Worries are often connected to what is important to us and what we value. By learning to notice, we can teach clients skills in changing or reframing thoughts that lead to excessive worrying.”
If you need support to discuss your worries or help develop strategies to manage your concerns, The Rosewood Centre offers counselling to adults, young people, children, and families across multiple locations.
To find out more or book an appointment, click here.